Discovering Your Why: The Secret to Thriving in Life and Overcoming Challenges

I am currently reading a book that is almost certain to become one of my favorite fiction books of all time, Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir. There is a quote that is very interesting:

“Human beings have a remarkable ability to accept the abnormal and make it normal.”

I would rather not give away any spoilers, but suffice to say it sunk in.

We as a species have the ability to adapt to almost any situation, which gives us an advantage that allows us to thrive and survive. This is a process called “hedonic adaptation” or “the hedonic treadmill,” in which our brains adjust to new experiences and eventually return to a baseline level of happiness.

For example, think about when you got your first job or bought a new car. At first, the excitement and novelty of these experiences may have brought you joy. But as time went on, the excitement wore off, and you went back to your normal level of happiness. This is hedonic adaptation at work.

However, our capacity for adaptation is not limited to positive experiences. We also adapt to negative events, such as loss, illness, and trauma. Consider Viktor Frankl, the man, the myth, the legend who survived three years in Auschwitz (Feel free to imagine Frankl as the guy from the movie “Life is Beautiful.”)

Frankl developed a therapeutic approach called Logotherapy, which is based on the belief that our primary drive in life is not pleasure, but the search for meaning and purpose. He believed that by finding meaning in our lives, we can overcome even the most difficult challenges and experience a sense of fulfillment and happiness.

Nietzche famously wrote :

“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”

Frankl also cited this quote in his book “Man’s Search for Meaning” and provides us with a sort of remedy for the negative effect of the hedonic treadmill.

In the book “Start With Why,” Simon Sinek expands on this idea of having a “why” in life and how it can help us achieve our goals. He explains that “people don’t buy what you do, they buy why you do it.” This means that to be successful, it is important to have a purpose and to make sure that it is clear to others.

Sinek argues that the most successful and inspiring leaders and organizations start with a clear understanding of why they do what they do, before thinking about what they do and how they do it, which he explains in a concept he calls “The Golden Circle”:

According to Sinek, the “why” represents the purpose, cause, or belief that inspires us and drives us forward. It is what sets us apart from others and gives us a sense of meaning and direction in life. Starting with why means that we begin by exploring our core values, beliefs, and the reason for our existence.

The idea is that by articulating and communicating our “why,” we can inspire others to join us on our journey and create a movement of people who are motivated and committed to a common purpose. On the other hand, organizations and individuals who only focus on what they do and how they do it risk being seen as interchangeable and lacking a clear sense of purpose.

Having a purpose in life and, to paraphrase Frankl, searching for a greater meaning is what life’s journey is all about. We all have the ability to adapt and overcome challenges. By articulating our “why,” we have the key to thriving in life and making a positive impact on the world; we just have to keep in mind that life is all about the journey, not the destination.